Your Menu for Making New Connections in July

A practical guide to making new friends, dating connections, and building community in your 30s with low-pressure summer activities that don't require a plus-one.

Whether you've just moved, want to meet people in your same life phase, or you're ready to date intentionally, making connections in your 30s hits different when it’s the first decade where we’re all the same age but living completely different lives.

I've been thinking a lot about that post I wrote a few months ago about making friends as an extroverted introvert.

When checking in with y’all over on IG about what the vibe for July is, so many of y’all said you were ready to make this a month of making new connections whether it’s with neighbors, new friends or dates.

Even though so many people leave the city in July, it’s still a great month to practice showing up. Summer breeds spontaneity and openness, and it even feels a little easier to do things solo because you can “pretend you’re on a trip.”

I created something for y’all, a menu for making connections this month. Not prescriptive advice that assumes we all want the same things, but options you can choose from based on what feels energizing (not draining) for you right now.

A note on meeting a potential date: I used to feel like I was the person who never got approached. That meeting in the wild was something that happened to other people, but not to me.

When I shifted that energy, this completely changed for me.

Each menu item on this list varies in time and committment levels, but these two quick shifts made a difference when it comes to all menu items:

• a little smile and making eye contact for 3 seconds (this felt insane at first, but works). Some people call this sticky eyes

• chatting with epople even if you’re never going to see them again makes life feel more vibrant, especially if you work from home - the ultimately carries through your day to day and makes you more approachable