Push Through or Pivot?
If you're a chronic overthinker, you know this conundrum well: How do you know when to keep pushing through versus when it's time to pivot?
Inside this issue:
• Curious: Push Through or Pivot? How to Actually Make the Call
• Hot: Why I Spent Years Thinking I Hated Botox And What Changed
• Most Shopped Last Week
• What to Wear to a Corporate Job
• Cultured: Random Rabbit Holes I’ve Gone Down Recently
• ICYMI: A Professional Matchmaker Audited (Roasted) My Dating App Profile & What Worked and Didn't Last Month as a Part-time Content Creator
Push Through or Pivot? How to Actually Make the Call
If you're a chronic overthinker, you know this conundrum well: How do you know when to keep pushing through versus when it's time to pivot?
The question haunts us everywhere. Should you quit the job that's slowly draining you, or stick it out hoping things will change? Do you keep swiping and showing up to mediocre dates, or accept that maybe love isn't in the cards right now? What about that friendship that feels more like work than joy - do you keep trying, or finally move on?
As an overthinker myself, I've learned that there's a particular kind of mental torture that comes with this in-between indecision. You end up spending more energy agonizing over the decision than you would dealing with either outcome. The endless weighing of pros and cons becomes more exhausting than just ripping off the band-aid, even if that means choosing the scarier option.
Here's what I've realized: pushing through isn't the same as being stuck in the purgatory of deciding whether to push through or pivot. One is action; the other is paralysis. And that paralysis? It will drive you more insane than potentially making the "wrong" choice ever could.
Every life stress feels lighter—sometimes significantly lighter—once you just make the decision, one way or the other. The relief that comes from choosing a direction, any direction, is often more valuable than choosing the "perfect" direction.
The only way I’m able to get through this loop is to stop asking for advice and to listen to my gut.
It’s hard to pinpoint how to know what’s your gut and what’s your brain, but for me it ultimately comes down to these questions:
Does pushing through give you a gut reaction of ick, stuck, fear? Or does pushing through feel like an exercise in patience that you know you can work through?
If it’s fear or you feel sick to your stomach, pivoting it is!
If it’s a matter of practicing patience and it feels like somewhat of a relief to push through. No need to pivot.
For pivoting - are you running away from something? Or moving towards something. I personally don’t think that running away solves any problems. However, pivoting with something that moves you forward closer to your goals and values, that is a healthy pivot.
And this should go without saying but, if you do need to ask a friend for advice and which way to go, take advice from people who are living a life you’d be happy living OR someone who you trust is giving advice based off of your values and where you want to go rather than from a what they would do.
What do y’all do to get out of this overthinking push through or pivot?
Why I Spent Years Thinking I Hated Botox And What Changed
As someone who spent the majority of their 20s in Dallas or LA, I was very late to the Botox party amongst my peers. My first experience with injectabiles was at 28 for lip filler (which I no longer do because of migration) but it wasn’t until maybe 32 that I started Botox.
My first dip into Botox was as a replacement for lip filler. I have a nautrally gummy smile and thin top lip and the combination of that has always left me feeling a little self-concious with my big smile.
After some time I thought, well I am starting to see fine lines on my forehead, might as well start tackling those too.
And let me tell you. I HATED it. I gave it a few chances over the course of a year and half and the frozen forehead just wasn’t my vibe. One of the times I got it was truly a nightmare because the location of where they injected the botox made it so that my eyebrows looked heavier and angry.
I ended up switching practitioners in Dallas and it was when I started going to see Barbara in Dallas (@lapetiteinjector) who specializes in face balancing, that I relalized that I didn’t hate Botox on me, it’s just not a one size fits all solution and only a well experience injector can guide you past the “copy paste” areas like forehead.
It is so critical to see someone who knows the ins and outs of your face from a medical POV, understanding deeply how each muscle affects the other.
I think it’s also crucial to be able to articulate to a new practitioner that you’re seeing exactly what you’re looking for.
For me, I realized that it’s not about looking frozen. It’s about looking brighter and lifted.
I recently started seeing Quinn (@injectorquinn) in DC (at Skin Spirit in Georgetown) and she fully understood the vibe that I go for.
Here’s what I got done:
• Crows feet
• Brow lift
• Gummy smile
• Lip flip
As someone who spent the majority of my twenties bouncing between Dallas and LA, I was notably late to the Botox party. While my peers were already well-versed in the art of preventative neurotoxins starting at age 23, I didn't have my first experience with injectables until about 28 and even then, it was lip filler not botox, which I've since abandoned due to migration issues btw.
It wasn't until 32 that I finally tried Botox, and not for the reasons you might expect. It wasn’t to freeze my forehead, it was to replace the lip filler. I was looking for a solution to something that had made me self-conscious for years: my naturally gummy smile paired with a thin upper lip.
Eventually, as fine lines began appearing on my forehead, I figured I might as well tackle those too.
I absolutely hated it.
The frozen forehead was just not my vibe. I gave it multiple chances over a year and a half, hoping I'd adjust or that different techniques would yield better results. One particularly nightmarish appointment left me with eyebrows that looked heavy and angry, thanks to poorly placed injections that pulled my entire expression downward.
The problem, I eventually realized, wasn't Botox itself. It was the one-size-fits-all approach that we tend to approach beauty with.
Everything changed when I found Barbara (@lapetiteinjector) in Dallas, who specializes in facial balancing and not cookie-cutter treatments. She was the first practitioner to look at my face as a whole rather than a series of isolated areas that are highly requested.
The difference between a good injector and an exceptional one lies in their ability to see your face from a medical perspective, mapping the intricate relationships between muscles and understanding how treating one area will impact your overall expression.
Now that I’m back in DC, I’ve been seeing Quinn (@injectorquinn) at Skin Spirit in Georgetown, who immediately understood the assignment. When I explained that my goal wasn't to look frozen but rather brighter and lifted she understood and came in with recommendations that I’ve been SO happy with.
My current treatment plan addresses four specific areas:
Crow's feet
Brow lift
Gummy smile
Lip flip for subtle upper lip enhancement without filler
The result? I look like myself, just more rested and radiant. My expressions remain authentically mine. I can still raise my eyebrows when I'm surprised, furrow my brow when I'm concentrating, and smile without reservation.
Botox is miraculous or necessary. The practitioner matters infinitely more than the product. Anyone can inject neurotoxin into predetermined spots, but it takes genuine expertise to enhance your natural beauty rather than erase your personality.
Never settle for treatments that make you feel less like yourself. Whether it's Botox, filler, or any other aesthetic procedure, the goal should always be to feel more confident in your own skin.
Shop: Urban Outfitters Floor Mirror // Abercrombie Linen Dress // Hill House Top // Alo Knit Skirt // Sezane Knit Dress // Sezane Gaspard Cardigan // Reformation Floral Tank
Random Rabbit Holes I’ve Gone Down Recently
LTK x Pinterest Partnership: a pilot program that will automatically share LTK posts to Pinterest. LTK will be sending batches of posts made on the LTK app directly to Pinterest on Creators’ behalf.
Japanese Coffee Beans - I’m deep deep down in the Reddit world of best coffee beans from Japanese makers
Skinvive - One of my besties got this done a few weeks ago and her skin is GLOWING so now I must learn more of why this works and how it works and all the things
A Professional Matchmaker Audited (Roasted) My Dating App Profile
Part 1: The 3 things she said I needed to change about my photos & I'm actually going to share these photos with y'all and the new-ish ones
I went to an event a few weeks ago where a professional matchmaker (one of the ones who set me up on a date, actually) spent 20 minutes auditing each attendee’s profile.
I’ve always been confused about what I’m “doing wrong” on the apps because I average about two dates per quarter, which is generous, if we're being honest. And before you say it’s because I’m too picky. Let me tell you….I don’t think I’m picky enough. I genuinely go weeks without someone who I would say no to, like my profile. Meanwhile, I have friends going on like 3 first dates a week, so something wasn’t quite right.
Within thirty seconds of scrolling through my photos, she delivered the kind of brutal honesty I didn’t know I needed.
What worked and didn't last month as a part time content creator
Part of what keeps the influencer space feeling like the wild west isn’t just how quickly it evolves. It’s the lack of transparency surrounding how any of it works.
Self-proclaimed Instagram experts will swear they’ve cracked the code on how to grow your audience, but most of them didn’t build their platforms as creators. They built them by promising creators the key to growth. Of course, the posts that say “I have the secret” are going to take off. That doesn’t have the same sense of pull as a video about your favorite sunscreen.
Then there’s the money part. One creator with 100 followers might be making $30k a year. Another with 40K followers could be clearing $300k. And before you’re like there’s no way - I have worked on the commission side of the industry for almost 6 years and I literally see each of these creators PayPal payments.
It leaves everyone feeling a little disoriented, like you have no idea whether you’re doing well or wasting your time.